Renn Fest - Music

I ventured to the Renaissance Festival this weekend.

Highlights included a pipe organ, an archery demo, elephant ride, lance-splintering joust (in which a knight was completely unseated), a sword swallower and a fist fight (not part of the show).

But my favorite part was a musical performance by the band Gypsophilia. We saw a performance that was sparsely attended (compared to other events). The music blends Turkish, Greek, Jewish, and old Middle Eastern influences in wheedling tunes with exotic beats. The band included violin, cello, percussion, and concertina (which I've determined, through process of elimination, to be a tiny accordion).

What completely struck me was their final song - an improvisation.

The percussionist started with an interesting beat, just two hands tapping on a medium hourglass drum strapped to his side. The cello began thumping into the rhythm, and the accordion fell into place. The violinist waited, swaying slightly and thinking before dipping into a melody.

It was their best piece. It was gorgeous, but quirky and upbeat, and I really wish I'd recorded it because it will never be heard again. You could see each musician listening to the others, and determining how to blend the music, following new cues.

I just kept thinking This is jazz. In middle school, our class read about the improvisational nature of true jazz. Musicians got together and just jammed. They didn't spin out the same music every night; they played what they felt in that moment, reacting to each other's notes and emotion.

I've always been fascinated with improv music, in part because I can't do it. I played flute for 8 years, but I can't hear a specific note and say That's C sharp. So I also need a minute to find the correct fingering.

On a related note, I imagined some of songs with a line of flute music.

It's like that famous scene from King Kong

...not the scene with the ape

or the girl

or Jack Black.

My house mildly resembles the scene where mutant giant jungle bugs attack the explorers.

When so many people were complaining about crickets in the basement, I was proud of our house for resisting the autumn onslaught of insect life. Turns out, fall only just began, and we also have cricket corpses in the basement. But I've never had a problem with them, so whatever.

It's the cloud of gnats that drives me mad. I know they're everywhere in fall, but they made it INSIDE the kitchen this year.

Possible reasons:

- they found an old banana and have been reproducing in secret

- kitchen plants are better real estate than outdoor plants

- they're planning a hostile takeover

- kitchen windows are usually open

If anyone else is having gnat problems, use this awesome gnat trap, courtesy of the internet:

- cup (disposable is handier)

- few tablespoons vinegar

- few drops kitchen soap

- fill cup with water

Leave it on the counter or in a problem area. Gnats will flock like seagulls on a tub of fries before drowning in their own vinegar-induced greediness.

Also I saw a larger-than-comfort-allows spider under the computer desk. It scuttled behind a wall when I chased it. Having no time to pursue, I moved the chair to the middle of room and continued working from my chair island. I'll pretend my meager bug spraying encouraged it to move next door.

It's Decorative Gourd Season, Home Boy

It's Autumn, which means it's time to get your pumpkin on. Today I celebrate the best pumpkin products of the season.

Pumpkin pancakes - With sausage! For a fundraiser. They're really fluffy, and you simply add pureed pumpkin and pumpkin spice to regular pancake batter.

Banana nut muffins (masquerading as pumpkin muffins) - My friend's cross country team sold these at a bake sale, but she wasn't really sure which flavor I was purchasing to support this worthy cause. However, her own mother made them. Still yummy, though unsatisfying in my quest for autumn gourd.

Pumpkin spice latte - Haven't gotten any yet. This is a serious crime to be remedied tomorrow because it'll be chilly.

Pumpkin ice cream - Haven't gotten any yet. To be remedied later this week when it's warm again.

Pumpkin candles - To be enjoyed year-round. I already own six, but last night I was admiring a small glass jar candle at the drug store. It was perfect in scent: rich, but not too spicy. After replacing the lid, I tried to place it back on the display. Instead, the lid slipped, and the candle jar smashed in pieces around the candy rack. Without turning around, Mum said, "Is there something else I have to buy?" I found the glass chunk with a price tag still attached, and the cashier scanned it while I apologized and warned her to clean the glass. Then I asked if I could still keep the loose candle. This makes up for all the things I didn't break when I was a kid.

Pumpkin soap - Oh, heck yes. Delicious for the nose, not the taste buds.

Carved pumpkins - I love carving and lighting pumpkins, but I've never been terribly original. Every single year since I was young, I carve a jack-o-lantern with the exact same triangle eyes and nose and toothy smile. Dad usually does the creative lantern: geometric shapes, stars & moon, giant tree. Last year, I stepped it up by carving a mermaid, but I think her arm fell off.

Wasted pumpkins - The downside of pumpkin carving. I once heard a farmer marvel that people spend big bucks for big pumpkins that they will just throw out and never eat. My family never made toasted pumpkin seeds, homemade pumpkin pie, etc., so jack-o-lanterns are a big waste on November 1. If we're lucky, we remember to toss them before the gnats set in.

Is anyone else celebrating gourd season?

Color Mad

I've always been a Crayola girl, which means every color has a name, from carnation pink to razzledazz and blue-green and green-blue.

So, I recently bid a fond farewell to my free time when IdiotsBooks.com posted a link to the most awesome search engine ever:

a color search engine.

The Multicolr Search Lab by Idée Inc. (bonus points for a French name) lets you choose up to 5 colors at any percentage. Then it immediately shows hundreds of images. The result display alone is art.

So, eh...have fun.

Conversations: the governor is a Sagittarius

Mid-July

Monica: "I'm interviewing the governor tomorrow. Do you want me to ask him anything?"

Laura: "What are you interviewing him about?"

Monica: "Jobs and the economy."

Laura: "Ask him what his star sign is."

Maria: "Ask him if he'd let us follow him for a day."

Later that week

Monica: "He's a Sagittarius!"

Laura: "You asked?"

Monica: "Yeah, I said, 'One of the reporters wants to know your astrological sign,' and he said, 'Sagittarius.'"

Laura: "Did you ask if we could follow him for a Day in the Life?

Monica: "Yeah, he said that's fine."

August 2

Maria: "Hi, we're here to see the governor. Laura and Maria..."

Director of Communications: "Great! It's nice to meet you. The Governor is this way..."

Laura: "And I just want to confirm: we're riding with him to each event?"

Director: "Yes, all four events."

Laura: "Cool."

Shooting Star

It's that time of year: karaoke. The seafood coworkers and I went to a bayside bar on Friday, where a scary, tall, drunk blonde danced all over the place and upstaged us during our rendition of "Thriller" (there are photographs of my young coworkers' horror).

In keeping with tradition of an old school solo, I also sang "Sway," the version by Michael Buble (insert accent mark). My boss recorded me with her phone, but here's Michael's version. I kept it classy by butchering the first line and laughing into the third line. Honestly can't say if I improved during the song, but the audience was very supportive.

We were there for nearly 3 hours, eating, chatting, and waiting for our turn to sing. For a few minutes, I sat at the rail overlooking the bay, which was gorgeous even in the dark. It's one of those views for which I'll risk crashing a car because my head turns 120 degrees every time I drive by. This time, I was rewarded for sitting still to admire the marsh because, for the first time, I saw a falling star.

I've seen prescheduled meteor showers, counting in the 2 a.m. cold of my backyard. But I've never glanced up on a whim to see a wish fall from heaven. It was amazing. Of course, I was on the phone in the middle of a mini crisis, so I only had time for a quick, lame wish. But my wish came true. All my friends found parking spots in a non-towing area.

How hot IS it?

I want to do this experiment.

I don't get sick...

But I did not have a fabulous weekend. I've been fairly busy this summer, still writing for the newspaper. (Did I ever mention that I got an actual job with them? I'm a staff writer as of the Memorial Day issue! More on that later.)

I spend half my time at the office and half at the seafood market. Last week, we prepared for the holiday paper, the largest issue ever. And I developed a slight cough by Thursday. And ear ache by Friday. On Saturday and Sunday, the two biggest days of the seafood season, I went home each night with a killer ear ache and inability to really hear anything. I felt okay during the day, but nighttime sucked.

Irony: I got an ear and throat infection on Friday night of a long weekend. Luckily, a hospital clinic in Kmart was open on Monday, so I could go get an antibiotic prescription. FINALLY.

Further irony: Dad's new insurance plan began Friday. The company somehow failed to register me, so we're waiting for that to kick in.

I couldn't even do interviews because I sounded bad and can't really hear on the phone. So for the first time in a while, I didn't submit any articles. Lame. Watched foreign films instead because I could read them. Glared at cough syrup for about an hour before I submitted to swallowing it. Also sat in the sun today, then sat on the porch and ate Mexican food while it rained, which was awesome. Back to seafood market tomorrow because I'm not contagious.

Faced with a half-cup of cough syrup, I'm suddenly an 8-year-old again. I glared at it for an hour before swallowing it.

Hope you all had a great Independence Day! I watched fireworks on TV. What did everyone else do?

Acqua di Give-me-a-break

I kind of almost like the Acqua di Gio commercial for men's cologne. I can do without the guy's intense face and greasy chiseled man abs, but the waves are gorgeous, and the whole thing is shot well enough.

I do not like the commercial for feminine counterpart Acqua di Gioia. Again there are lovely beach shots, but instead of simply mugging the camera, the woman is basically orgasming onscreen. Because most women can't contain themselves when writhing in the jungle or in the waves.

(To channel my inner-Dr. Wolff) Why isn't the man rubbing his chest in pleasure and flouncing in the shallow waves? How come the woman can't go deep-sea diving?

Gio: awesome swan dive

Gioia: soft-core porn

April Showers

Hello all. Haven't posted recently, so here's life on my side of the world:

It's spring, thank God. As usual, I attempted to plant a few seeds, but this year using homemade tin can planters.

Nothing came of the California strawberries (surprisingly), and the green onions only grew bitter.

But check out this fine apple tree:

The exciting mystery here is whether it'll be Granny Smith or Gala. I managed to drop all of the seeds just before planting.

And now: medical oddities.

I've always been fairly healthy (except for the lobster incident of 2007) and mostly without insurance. I've been holding out on getting physicals and whatnot until I rejoin my parents' (new) plan in just two more months.

Suddenly, weird stuff is happening. To my left side.

I think I have poison ivy for the first time. Just a small bit above my hip. Don't know why. It's not super itchy, and it is going away. But now I see the plants everywhere. I have to sidestep them when walking down the street.

Also I found a lump, not exactly in my chest, but in that "zone of concern." It's maybe 7 inches down my side (above the poison ivy). After 1.5 weeks, I think it actually shrank a little, so it's probably of no concern. But the shower is never so lonely as when you encounter something like that. Will see a doctor soon.

Finally, I had carpal tunnel for a few days last week, which I truly think is the stupidest condition (next to gluten allergy). It came in the middle of my attempt to complete a 1300-word article, so typing was hell.

In general, April was a pretty stupid month. Had a few decent times. I'll tell you about the Spelling Bee later.

April's Theme Song

"You're Standing on My Neck" by the Splendora.

Naughty Toast Revisited

I wrote briefly about Naughty Toast, that delightfully impromptu pastry. Last time, it was chocolate-peanut butter-strawberry toast. But today it's buttered brown sugar cinnamon.

Clarification:

Naughty Toast is whatever you need it to be.

Vicariously Traveling

If you're not reading Kendall's travel blog, you should. It's all about beautiful places and good food.

kendallclark.blogspot.com

And she's in Europe.

Maybe I am mean

I'm at the library and just saw a woman with a few youngsters, maybe 3 or 4 years old (I am grumpy and hazardously sleep-deprived). One of them toddled by and fell on the ground. He was fine, so I smiled.

Then I looked out the window and imagined every 4-year-old on earth falling down at the same time. And I smiled more.

This may not be healthy.

But, actually I'm now chuckling loudly, and staring at this kid out of the corner of my eye. He's running back and forth on hardwood floor, so his shoes make this WAK-WAK-WAK-WAK-WAK sound. I'm just cracking up.

Oh, his mom made his stand still again.

Embroidered Penguin Classics

Check this out!

http://blog.jilliantamaki.com/2011/03/penguin-threads-deluxe-classics/

Apparently they'll be released this fall.

Clothing with a Story

Today's fashion is pretty decent. It's classy and doesn't involve shoulder pads. Most notably, the good stuff hearkens back to the 1950s and '60s, when fashion entered the modern age, but retained some elegance.

Someone from my mom's work sent me a small clothing catalogue - and I recently rediscovered the website - for a fantastic company that is bringing the classic fashions back, exactly as they were.

The J. Peterman Company is found at www.JPeterman.com. All of the images are illustrated, which is lovely, but makes it a little difficult to envision in person. But check this out:

The product descriptions alone make the website worth visiting. EACH page tells a story. This is for the "Russian Navy Shirt":

"Wait a minute. Does Russia really have a navy?

They do. Of course they do.

Watch the news on TV tonight. If they're wearing striped shirts like this, it's the Russian Navy.

Unless you see a dark-eyed girl paddling a green boat and her boyfriend laughs and smokes and laughs and his cigarette is slightly less than one inch long and permanently attached and he is wearing a not bad-looking striped navy shirt, then it's France.

Unless it's New York.

But if the girl and her boyfriend are both blonde, and pale smoky-eyed, and he, you notice, is deeply tanned and wearing a striped navy shirt, then it's Finland.

...

Under a suit jacket, it's L.A. Or maybe Munich.

...

Unless it's Central Park."

If any of the product description stories are true, then many of the fashions - and fragrances - are based on real designs from back in the day.

If not, then you've still just read the best fashion writing available.

And there's even more classy old stuff: men's clothing, collections of luggage, antique kitchenware, old English pub signs, etc.

This is a site I'll be saving for.

Naughty Toast

I've been craving chocolate cake just about once a week for the last few months. It's actually become part of habitual routine that is highlighted by writing and cooking the same things on the same days.

Depending on my spontaneity and laziness levels at the time, I may attempt a homemade chocolate pastry or I might dash to Royal Farms for HoHos.

Last night, I chose culinary adventure.

Tunneling through the fridge, I discovered just enough decadence to make a decent snack: toast with peanut butter, chocolate frosting, and strawberries.

As usual, I used the first name that came to mind: Naughty Toast. It seems appropriate for a choco-peanut-berry thing created in desperation at 10 p.m.

Unfortunately, by the time I thought to take a picture, I'd already eaten the most attractive portion. I'll let you use your imagination on this one.

Phobia Confirmed

I never realized how terrifying firefighting truly is until I observed training at a local station. It's literally a nightmare come true.

During an interview, an Assistant Chief let me try the training maze. I suited up with an air pack, which is probably comparable to scuba gear. It's also heavy and cumbersome.


The mask limits visibility because the nose piece juts out like a beak. First you connect the breathing tube and inhale. The contraption gasps horribly and shoves air into your lungs. It continues to breathe noisily with you.

Let's recap:

Heavy suit.

Bulky equipment.
Limited visibility.
Uncomfortable breathing.

For training, the station has a two-level wooden "maze" that everyone must crawl through IN PITCH DARKNESS. In pairs, the firefighters pass booby traps that hinder passage or simulate floor collapse. The second floor has standing room so they can pelt headfirst down a ladder.

The ground floor is 3' x 3' crawl space that twists like intestine.

Now, here's my recurring nightmare:
I can't see. I can't breathe. I'm wearing a ridiculously large mascot suit, and I must dive into a little trapdoor or tunnel. Maybe it's an enclosed water slide that was plugged up at the bottom.

Conclusion:
Even with outside lights on, the maze was so dark and nightmarish that I barely made it 5 feet inside. I reached the first "twist, climb over this, and the floor will shift," and I told my partner I was done. My audience was politely surprised to see me emerge ten seconds later from the entryway.

The Fire Chief said the maze is virtually the same as a real fire.

I have so much respect for those people.

Mad About Gatsby

I first read The Great Gatsby as a college freshman, deciding I should be prepared for when an English professor inevitably assigned it. Honestly, I don't remember exactly what drew me in, but I've become smitten with those fast tragic jazz age books.

So imagine my delight this week over two major Gatsby developments.

PART ONE: Computer game.


That's right. It's found at www.greatgatsbygame.com.

You are Nick Carraway, searching mansions and gardens for the Great Gatsby:

Power up! After finding a ritzy yellow hat, Nick becomes a classy man with a mission: destroy the martini-toting butlers. He does this by chucking a boomerang (not pictured) at them. Because we all know that social-climbers don't fight with their hands.

To provide some storyline, we get a lonely glance at Jay Gatsby, always looking for that green light.


Fortunately, I don't spend more than five minutes on the site because it's not terribly interesting. Plus, the third level is just a pair of floating eyes that shoot laser beams. My boomerang is useless against it, so I just run around until boredom sets in.

Or until I die.
PART TWO: Movie.

Oh yes. Oh yes. There are so many reasons to be excited about the 2012 feature. Most importantly, Baz Luhrmann is directing. If you're not familiar with the gentleman, he wrote and directed Strictly Ballroom, Romeo + Juliet, Moulin Rouge, and Australia. I haven't seen the last film, but Luhrmann's overall style is fantastically vivid.

Plus, Leonardo DiCaprio will star as Jay Gatsby, Tobey Maguire is Nick Carraway, and Carrie Mulligan won the coveted role of Daisy Buchanan.

I'm so excited.

Possible downside: 3-D. I'm not a fan.

Harford 3C...In Your Dreams

I dreamt last night that ALL of my Englishy suitemates from sophomore year were together in the same...hallway. I think there was no space for us in the main room, so we girls set up lawn chairs in a nearby hallway. We were going to watch a drama production at the beach, which doubled as Alexis & Aubrey's apartment. Corey was there too, helping the two drama majors in filming a television broadcast of the show.

Plus, I rebuked a rude woman in French.

Good dream.

In fact, it was a much better dream than a few nights ago, when I was trying to find a Plan-B pill. The school nurse with shaking hands said she could jab a giant needle down my back or I could wait ten days for someone else to help. I thought needles and waiting periods defeated the purpose of the "Day After pill."

So, yeah, H3C for the win! Miss you guys.

Acceptance.

Although I still occasionally mope about not having a real money-maker of a job (stop that! No more of it. Move on.), I really like writing part-time for the local newspaper. As a regular at editorial meetings, I'm getting to know the other reporters and take on new types of articles (town meeting, school prayer lawsuit, murder trial, etc.).

My official position as freelancer was to pick up stories other writers couldn't cover. But I appreciate my editor's efforts to make me part of the team. I went to the office Christmas party and was invited to an important local luncheon with the editorial staff. I often feel like one of them, only with fewer articles.

And then yesterday, the editor assigned me a new project: an enterprise story.

"You ready?" he said.

"I think so."

An enterprise piece is an in-depth, three-part article. Our paper recently investigated a huge highway project (and possible scandal, which has since been halted since publication). Another enterprise piece just began on prescription drug abuse.

The writer begins with long-term research and a thousand interviews. How do you finish? At some point in the process, I was told, you just decide to stop writing.

I'm writing the elusive real-world thesis. My subject will be volunteer fire departments.

VFDs (an important subject in A Series of Unfortunate Events) are a huge part of the culture here. All of the local stations are entirely volunteer-based and non-competitive. I'll examine the funding, partnerships, people - whatever comes to light.

I'm kind of excited.

Prospective Careers

These are some of the careers I've sniffed out while job-hunting during the last few weeks:

Editorial Assistant
Continuous Improvement Engineer
Epidemiologist
Constable
Dean, Law School
Animal Cage Washer
Chief of Party
Sous Chef
High-Voltage Electrician
Greeter
Someone To Clean My Condo

I love the variety. The world is my oyster.

Reunited and it feels so good...

This week of discovery continues!

There are three belongings that I haven't seen since leaving the dorms last May, all of varying importance.

1. My portable flash drive. Big disappointment. Dozens of essays, poems, stories, and graphics were stored on my thumb drive. I'm lucky to have copied some of these to my laptop a few weeks earlier.

2. A white canvas jacket. This was supposed to dress up a skirt I'd purchased a month earlier. Very cute.

3. Dressy flip flops. As my only sole choice of footwear in 45+ degree weather, I love flip flops, yet never found just the right replacement for these...

I've missed these items throughout the summer, fall, and winter. I've cursed my packing skills and sheepishly regarded my poor housekeeping time and time again:


But then, everything changed. While storing suitcases a few days ago, Mum rediscovered the one thing I had missed most:
Yeah, the jacket was cute, and the thumb drive was necessary, but come on ... wouldn't you be excited to see these again?

Design-a-Calendar 1999

My efforts to reduce clutter have led to my throwing out five things everyday. It can be junk, old clothes, books, or unnecessary toys. One day, the progress will be noticeable. I think it'll be when all of my clothes fit comfortably in the bureau.

Today I wandered down to a box of activity books, which was never unpacked after we moved out of my childhood home ten years ago. Inside, I found one of the better presents of my life: Design-a-Calendar 1999: Countdown to the year 2000!

This was the coloring book of calendars. You drew the main illustration and colored little images around the page. THEN you mauled the pages with your choice of 140 appointment/holiday stickers. Too cool.

For instance, this is June. Obviously I had a very healthy attitude regarding the start of summer.

And this is the page for August:

Don't you love it? I'd learned how to boogie board and was enthralled. Let's take a look at that. See how joyous I was, right at the front of the wave:

I imagine everyone should be so happy to fly over the sea with hair billowing and letters flying.